We go through seasons in marriage don’t we? Sometimes we feel like we’re on cloud nine and so infatuated with our spouses. Other days, it feels like the complete opposite, and we find ourselves anxiously waiting for better days. In the tougher times, it’s a lot harder to show love or go out of our way for the other person. Especially when we’re exhausted by life or bogged down by stress. Or just trying to keep our heads above water with everything we have going on. Then we’re kind of just going through the motions.
I’ve been in one of those going through the motions kind of seasons lately. Not necessarily in a bad place, just kind of doing life on autopilot and not intentionally making those efforts that show that I care.
Honestly, I’ve been tired. And my fatigue has caused my husband’s needs to fall to the bottom of what feels like a never-ending list of to-dos. I’ve been so caught up with taking care of the baby and my 5 year old, and helping with online school. All while still trying to fit in time to cook, clean, and exercise. Romance, and even the little things, have kind of been put on the back burner.
My husband, however, has been doing all kinds of nice gestures lately. Simple things that make me feel loved, and like he sees all the work and sacrifice that’s taking place on my end. Even though he’s been running on little sleep, working long hours, and has had a lot on his plate also.
His love and intentional efforts have caused me to want to step it up in the romance department. To be more considerate and look for ways to ease his load and make him feel special as well. His simple acts of love and kindness have been contagious.
Doing the little things for your spouse goes a long way.
Especially when life gets hard. When there’s a multitude of things to do. When you’re just trying to get through the week and keep it together. Those gestures brighten up the day to day routine. They ease the load. And they have the potential to make your husband feel special.
It can be simple things like making or buying him his favorite food. Sending a text to let him know you’re thinking about him. A hug and a kiss goodbye. Saying I love you often. Treating him to things that he’d normally pay for.
Taking the time to do nice things, whether big or small, matter in a relationship. And they might create a spark that makes him want to start putting in the same effort, if he hasn’t been already. It could remind him of how things used to be. Or give him a glimpse of how things can be if both of you are doing things to intentionally show love and appreciation.
Simple acts of love are contagious.
And if you’ve been like me, and haven’t been taking the time to put in the effort, it might be just what your spouse and marriage need right now.
Going forward, I’m trying to be more mindful of what I’m doing or not doing in my marriage. I know every season won’t be the same, and there will inevitably be times where life throws things off course. But I plan to be more intentional, take more notice of the things that my husband does for me, and try to do more to make him feel special and appreciated.
So the next time we find our husbands in one of those going through the motions kind of seasons, let’s try being the ones showering them with kind gestures and seeing what we can do to take things off their plates. Let’s keep this love cycle going!